Survivor: Connecticut Prison Facility

If there is a God, let there be a God of bad television so he will hear my prayer that the agreement between Martha Stewart and Mark Burnett means we all get to go to prison with Martha and watch her every single day as she struggles to make incarceration “a good thing.”
Please, please, please, please, please? I mean, think of it! Martha behind bars, telling the screws how to iron their uniforms to get the creases straight, taking her bitch in hand to instruct her about all the proper ways to service her. Oh, I’m shivering with antici… pation!
Martha recently told the judge in her case to throw her in the clink now so she could get the inconvenience of prison time over and get on with the more important aspects of her life, like creating the world’s best sugar cookie and buying the darling kilim she found at that roadside antique store near Killington.

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