Hey, you smell like an asshole!

It’s so bulky it barely fits in normal lanes or parking spots. It weighs over three tons. It gets single digit gas mileage. And it puts everyone on alert that you don’t care one lick about any of that.
And now, it is a cologne.
That’s right, the newest fragrance for men is Hummer which they describe as “the essence of adventure.” I’d bet even money that it’s nothing but a mixture of diesel fuel and steak sauce.

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