Prison stripes are the new black

Matha Stewart spent Thanksgiving with a convicted cocaine dealer and thinks prison food sucks. These are but two of the revelations that Martha has experienced since being jailed for stock market shenanigans.
Also: she has lost 10 lbs.; she makes crab-apple jelly even though the prison store is horribly inadequate; she’s worth more now than when she entered prison; prison reform for non-violent first-time offenders and drug users needs to be taken more seriously.
Also, apparently, prison is a mess. Please send Pine Sol.

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