Latest threat to youth: Vicious tanning booths!

You know how dumb kids are, right? You might even be a kid, and I’m here to tell you, for your own good, you’re an imbicile. So much so that the American Medical Association wants to protect you from yourself and your need to sport a “healthy” tan. They want to prohibit anyone under 18 from using indoor tanning beds because you’re too stupid to realize that you’re slowly killing your skin in an effort to look more tropical.
Also: you’re fat, you drink too much, and all those video games you play are too violent for you, so let’s also regulate what you eat, drink and use for entertainment — to protect you! From yourselves!

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