Author Archives: Lance Arthur
A Natural Disaster
Earthquakes, volcanos, tidal waves, Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin. Is there no end to the nightmares we must suffer as residents of planet Earth? Continue reading
Ebert’s Game
What we’d like to do, if you’ll allow, is to compare a few of the games we’ve made available for our employees in The Game Room with famous works of what is generally recognized to be “art,” just to see, you know, if they’re in the same ball park, so to speak. Continue reading
The Perfect Sandwich
This is America, god damn it. This is fried chicken and bacon country. This is the land that invented the drive-thru and the ATM. So if you hate the Double Down, it’s clear that you hate America. Continue reading
What Drug Does One Take to Recover From Prescription Drug Commercials?
So the drug manufacturer, thinking either “Now we can help all those poor, unfortunate bald eyelid sufferers” or, more likely, “Now we can rake in more dough with a narrowly-defined drug by making women ashamed of yet another physical feature which has no actual bearing on their health or happiness!” (the latter, we’re guessing) and they grabbed Brooke to bemoan publicly that her lashes simply cannot hold up to comparison with the caterpillariness of her Andy Rooney eyebrows, and a new market was born. Continue reading
24-Hour Party People
Having problems because you’re rich? We’ll take all that filthy lucre off your hands and spend it wisely on things like shoes, fresh flowers, indoor hot tubs and wall-to-wall shag. Because frankly, old white dudes, we’re feeling about as sorry for you as we do for… someone we couldn’t give a rat’s ass about. Continue reading
Wait, What?
Wanna know a secret, just between us girls? We are kinda into that Sarah Palin bitch. I mean, who else do you know who’s that stupid and that popular? Dumb and hot is hot and dumb! If “dumb” means “hot.” Continue reading
Counting from Fifteen
We don’t know what we’re going to do, yet. The plans aren’t dry, and the contractors aren’t hired. Hell, at this point we don’t even have a budget or a schedule. All we know is that we are once again marching forward into that bright, hot tomorrow with a fresh, clean Pee Chee folder, a fresh set of Dixon Ticonderogas (#2) and a pink eraser with the imprinted label still clear to read. There’s an unopened package of college-ruled paper on the desk and the school bell is about to ring. Continue reading
Fourteen and Counting
On April 14, 2010, glassdog.com turns 14 years old. Huzzah! Thanks! Continue reading
Visualizations
iTunes 8 was released to the world today, and included in its myriad upgrades and changes — but not even mentioned by Sir Steve in his presentation, sadly — is a new visualizer that looks suspiciously familiar to yours truly. … Continue reading